remembering // light changes what’s around it

1 year ago, I wrote this:

Yes folks. That’s the latest news in my life. I have decided to move to Nashville. The details are still very much in the process. I’m applying for jobs and looking for ways to “make it work.” Mostly I’m just saying, “YES!” to where Jesus is taking me and I’m rather excited about the adventures that await… (and sometimes also a little freaked out by the number of unknowns involved… but that’s living, right?)

Since then, I got a car. I moved to Nashville and became a part of the most amazing body of believers! I got a job. I started dating and fell in love. I got my own apartment and lived alone (after having 20 roommates in the past 10 years). I got engaged. I quit my job. I got married. I got rid of my apartment and moved into his. And I turned 30 (a couple of weeks ago).

Yes folks. It’s been a crazy year –  an amazing CRAZY year. Whirlwindish in the best way.

Now, I’m really excited about THIS season. It seems as though I’m settling in – not just to Nashville, to Body Life (living in community with members of His body), or to married life… although that is happening too… But a more significant settling in is occurring when it comes to my identity in Christ.

You may have caught this above but, if you didn’t, I’m not working at the moment. Right before we got married, it became clear that I needed to quit my job. Quitting was honestly quite hard, even though I really didn’t want to be in the position I was working in. [It’s a long story.] Jon and I made the choice because we wanted more LIFE (read: Christ) and less of what isn’t LIFE. And I haven’t looked for another job yet. I will, when the Lord tells me it’s time. For now, He’s told me that it is a time to REMEMBER.

I don’t know what all this journey of remembering entails. So far, it’s included re-awakening a part of me that has been in hibernation for many years.

When I was in middle school, I did stuff like this with oil paints…

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I used to think of it as just a hobby, a talent, or maybe sometimes a passion… It filled my time and I wanted to be social instead, so I quit, because I found life with people. I didn’t find it sitting in a room painting. And yet, ever since I quit – so many years ago, I’ve wanted to start again. It’s like a part of me was trapped and needed to find it’s way out. But painting takes time, and I never had enough of it.

I’ve only just started back up and haven’t done much yet, but it’s been so fun. I don’t paint like I used to. It’s very different now (and so am I). And unlike before, it’s so life-giving to me. I now realize that painting isn’t just a hobby, a skill, or a passion… It’s a way that Christ has given me to express Him… And as I am REMEMBERING that (because while my head didn’t know before, my spirit always did), I’m excited to discover Him through it and to find LIFE in the expression of Him.

Here’s what I’ve worked on this week. It’s not done yet, but you can see part of the process of painting/creating/remembering/expressing below. I’m thankful to have the time and the means to wake up this part of me that’s been asleep for so long. I’m not sure what all it will entail but I’m thankful for this season, and for my husband and a body of believers here in Nashville who have encouraged me to explore it…


… I love the way that light changes what’s around it.

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